Johanna was six months pregnant with Crowley's baby and she felt as if she couldn't take this anymore. After Crowley told Dean that Johanna was him; Dean hadn't spoke to Johanna once and that killed her. She felt alone and scared and she wanted it to end. She was in the bathroom and locked the door, she quickly drew a demon trip and sat on the floor with her phone. She had to tell her father how she felt and say sorry, but the only way that was coming to her mine was a poem and that was how she would do it.
I can’t stand to live anymore
I just want to die and end it all.
The pain of living is just the start,
I’m sorry that I’m breaking your heart.
It started with hate, but now it’s little too late.
My life is a mess and I can only confess,
That inside it hurts none the less.
I’m sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused,
But in the end it’ll be okay because this is the only way.
I’m sorry for worrying you, I’m sorry for distressing you.
I’m sorry for killing you inside.
Daddy it saddens me to see you cry
You’re the one who helped me get by.
You taught me to walk
You taught me to talk.
Without you I wouldn’t even be here and I will always hold you dear.
Daddy you’re the greatest guy in the world.
I never appreciated the time we had.
Inside I was daddy’s girl
But I never showed you I cared
Without your guidance I wouldn’t be here
You told me that I never had to fear.
For such a long time I have felt this way and all I have to say is
“I love you” but it doesn’t seem like enough.
I know what you are about to go though is tough.
You are the best parent a girl could ever have.
It’s just, all I want to do is die.
So this, I guess, is my goodbye.
She hit send on her phone and began to cry. She wanted out of all this, and this was the only way she could think of. Her life was a mess and she get wasn't strong enough to take this. She didn't want to hurt her father, but she couldn't take this. She hoped her father understood.
